04 April 2006


I'm looking for an apartment at the moment. My rent skyrocketed and I'm not going to pay $900 for a 9x7 foot room. That's some bullshit.

So I'm looking. I stayed in my old place for an additional month (paying $900) because I didn't want to make a flash decision, nor did/do I want to move into a place that's going to cost me $900 and is just a little bigger. Because, no matter how hard I try to forget it, the point is I CANNOT pay $900/month plus utilities. Plus, I'm not certain the way I live in NYC is worth it. It's not like I go out much. I work at night, so I don't go to concerts and I'm rarely motivated to go to museums and the like during the day. I could live in Minneapolis on what I make and live in my parents' guest bedroom (just thinking here, Mom and Pops) and save some serious dough and then....travel. Thusly remedying the negative accumulation of adventure in my life. I think adventure may actually be actively sapped from me every time I get out of bed...but this is merely speculation. Anyway, is it worth it to live in Manhattan, but to not really LIVE here? Am I experiencing what it is to live here? Is it worth the rent to merely eat, work and sleep here?

The point is, when I search NYC Craigslist, I put in my rent min/max: $700-$800 and the places that come up are "Forest Hills," "Fresh Meadows," "Weehawken." I have to move to the suburbs!

Part of me is VERY excited about this. I can get my bike out here and bike around my hood. I'll own the neighborhood in a year (know my neighbors; the hardware store folks; coffee shop saviors) and that's important.

The part I'm not excited about is that people won't visit me-and it, inevitably, narrows ones' dating pool (proximity and convenient subway lines are very important parts of dating in Manhattan, from what I can tell). Also, it's just far. And I hate getting out of bed. I have to actually THROW the covers off of me to freeze myself into the shower. LAME. And mildly pathetic. Sometimes I just put the covers back on. Those days are when I get an "F".
Is it worth applying to clubs in Mpls to leave New York? Will I live with myself well if I leave New York, where I never planned to live, and now expect myself to just do it, make it? When I don't even know what that means.

At this point, I just miss driving around the lakes and looking at the houses and whipping around in the MG.

Rob, remember when you'd take me out for a drive in the MG? You'd smoke a cigarette and wait for me outside Calhoun Square while I ran in to "Cookie" to get a white chocolate and macadamia nut cookie? Ultimately, I started smoking cigarettes, too. We'd drive around Lake of the Isles, Lake Calhoun and Lake Harriett (and if all went really well, Cedar Lake), all in the 1951 MG-TD. What lakes. What cookies. What company. That's how we grew together, I think. That's how we got used to each other; knowing full well, even at 14 and 16, that, in the end, we'd be all either of us had-and Nate, of course. Gowing up with you made me a lot of who I am today.

Thanks, dude. I love you!

To suburbia I go. Plus some job apps...

xing the fingers.


At 5:19 PM, Anonymous PW said...

What a wonderful trio you are! Do you remember the three of you in sleeping bags in front of the fireplace on Clinton Ave? [I think you had the alligator bag (handed down from Tom to Nate to Rob to you.) The bag eventually ended up with Kieran!] And, what about Fun Fridays? The list goes on. Cousins are the best!


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