...

All was for the party.

-Clarissa Dalloway
Mrs. Dalloway by Virginia Woolf

PS July 30 is my year anniversary of blogging...time, how do you say? flies.

Wow Is Spot On

From an email I just sent to a friend-seemed more like a post to me, so thought I'd edit a bit and put it here--All is grand! How are you? Quick aside: I work plainly silly hours some (most) times and one of the things that really trips me up is wanting to socialize post-work. I talk to a lot of people but it sure doesn't feel "social". It just kind of adds to the work. And having friends who are patrons doesn't make it less work, it makes it more. I LOVE having people up, but oy, it takes a lot to explain that when I'm working. There are actually things to do-which is not always apparant to the common spectator of a service industry job being carried out. How many drains to unplug, inter-employee fires to put out, drunk people to ask to leave, paperwork so people get paid, explaining to do, deal making, pleading...is endless. Restaurants and the extension of them, I think, at the moment, is one of the most real, intense real life dramas. I'm glad to be a part of it, but for people who don't work IN it, it must be so difficult to imagine what we just may be doing all the time...It's really a lot of stuff. Anyway, my desire to chat and be with friends after (and outside of) work, is very real. Now to work the schedule so it works for me...That's it...to the email:

Just had a drink with one of our chefs-first time he and I'd had drinks since we've worked together. Refreshing. I really do like the folks I work with. Interesting, complex and over-all lovely.

Had the chance to spend some quality time on the roof of my work tonight. The cresent moon was out in all its glory. Was red just before it dipped below the horizon. Earlier in the night there were gorgeous low clouds flying over us. Planes flying through them looked like ufos and allowed my mind to wander. Priceless. It's so great to see the same thing in a different way for the first time.

Started reading Mrs. Dalloway. Reads like the movie felt, which makes me admire the writers/directors of The Hours. I need to see it again.

Tonight around 11 I had the first tinge of a wish for sweater weather. Funny that we (I) spend plenty of my time wishing current weather away for weather of the coming months. No doubt come Feb I'll be wishing for sweltering heat.

Airplane by The Indigo Girls

Up on the airplane
Nearer my God to thee
I start making a deal
Inspired by gravity
If I did wrong I won’t do it again
Cause I can be sweet and good and nice
And if I had enemies their friends
I’ll hold to my life with the grip of a vice

And I’m up on the airplane
Nearer my God to thee
I start making a deal
Inspired by gravity

That little spot on the ground is my hometown
I like to call it my home and it’s sweet
I’d rather take a seat down there
Than a throne up here up above 30,000 feet
And I’m up on the airplane

I never should have read my horoscope
Or the fortune on the bubble gum strip
Saying what you think won’t happen will
A great thing to read before a trip
On an airplane

Pilot says the big blue sky’s like a swimming pool
Big fluffy clouds like a feather bed
I’d rather have a real pillow underneath my head
Lying in my bed which is in my hometown
Which is on the ground
Far from an airplane
(my bed my hometow )
Far from an airplane
(on the ground my bed my hometown)
Far from an airplane
(on the ground my bed my hometown)
On the airplane
(on the ground)
[I’ll be making a deal]

Poem in Thanks

I won't pretend to be a well read patron of poetry, but I will admit that I'd very much like to be. I wouldn't even mind having a few ditties committed to memory, so when I'm old, I'll have the equivilent of Sam McGee that my grandfather was famous, among us, for reciting.

Poem in Thanks
Thomas Lex

Lord Whoever, thank you for this air
I'm about to in- and exhale, this hutch
in the woods, the wood for fire,
the light--both lamp and the natural stuff
of leaf-back, fern and wing
For the piano, the shovel
for ashes, the moth-gnawed
blankets, the stone-cold water
stone-cold: thank you.
Thank you, Lord, coming for
to carry me here -- where I'll gnash
it out, Lord, where I'll calm
and work, Lord, thank you
for the goddamn birds singing!

Home or Cafe?

I'm bound to write more. Things are piling up in my brain. I'm going to attempt a list so I don't forget...

hook and ladders
Kite Runner, Tender at the Bone, Sexing the Cherry
family reunion
mini watermelons
cool clock on joshpear.com
"home"
real vacation
brides maid dresses

Back soon, I think!

One Big Production

Bienvenido a vida.

It's all just one big production-and I'm glad for that.

Tomorrow my big production is getting Cassie and myself up for coffee before we proceed to antiquing. I have to say, my life has become a spectacular place-dare I say it's always been.

I've managed to find myself surrounded by crazy and sane friends alike; to know my parents still and love them so dearly I can hardly stand it; to admire my brother for his adventure and daring; to see New York every day differently; to wake up every day and have the wear-with-all to keep on keeping on. For serious: what more is there?

Life amounts to nothing short of spectacular. My friends do more and more amazing things every day, I love them through out and benefit from their development.

Bottom line, is I'm blessed, and to go to bed faster, I'm going to leave it at that.

Love, and lots of it, since that's all there is-to you.

I Got Nothing

I mean, really, there's a lot-my fascination with film production; my interest in emergency relief management; my sudden peak in reading; new crushes; feeling good about my job and like there may be a future in something remotely pertaining to it-and being almost adjusted to f'ing New York Shitty.

So I have a lot. I have a lot of things-physical, mental, emotional and spiritual and it makes me so glad because, with all those things comes a constant reminder that I'm in the most intense experience we all have the privilege of knowing: life. And ours, I presume yours if you're reading this blog (because that is a privileged act unto itself) are yet undefined and malleable. The lives we lead are full of "culture" and "love" and "great things". And it's true, those things do exist in our lives. The thing that's taking me aback at the moment is that Americans can just NOT fully understand the plights of peoples around the world. We life in high-falooting times that don't allow us to extrapolate, in real terms, what the rest of the world is like. And this will bite us in the behind after not-too-long.

And with that, I sign off, to go to work on Independence Day.

Love, as always-
The Hottest Woman in Brooklyn (I don't have AC)

Whew!